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Dracula Tooth "Mase" of Blood Letting
The legend of the Dracula Tooth "Mase" of Blood Letting is shrouded in mystery like a really cool magical shroud. It is a special mace owned at one point by Darrell the Bog King. The spikes of the mace are from the teeth of a thousand draculas. It is a mace but spelled "Mase" like the rapper. The mace looks like the one from Harry Potter but full of cool blood and parts of dead skeletons. It has to be covered at all times because whoever looks at it gets explosive blood diarrhea. History Nobody knows exactly who forged it but it is known what makes it up. The materials that make up the mace were written down in ancient texts in a long forgotten language. The characters that make up this unnamed alphabet are hot dudes boning. The steel that makes up the ball and rod of the mace are made from the chemicalyy recycled swords of the twelve most powerful viking warriors who had fallen in battle. The swords are said to posessess the power of all their ancestors combined. All of the viking warriors were half brothers. Their dad was the Norse god of Getting Hoes Pregnant as Fuck and their mother was a massive whore. No one knows how the brothers died but they think it was from Herp C, passed down from their whore mother. The original owner of the mac won it in a kissing competition against the Draculas. The handle of the mace is made out of the broom stick of the most evil with in the land, Dildoa. Witches' broom were once used as dildos so the handle was marinated in Dildoa's queef box stank. At the Battle of the Bog, the mace killed over 10,000 bog slaves single handedly which would lead to the end of the second world war of Daranos. Darrell the bog King or one of his Bog Knights was the one wielding it during the battle. Before Darrell owned the mace, it was wielded by an unnamed dark knight from New Jersey who used it for bad deeds. That is why New Jersey is a cursed earth and why the whole state smells like a dookie queefed out of a dead raccoons fart. Special Powers Along with giving anyone who looks at it explosive blood diarheaa, The Dracula Tooth "Mase" of Blood Letting gives the wielder an erection lasting the ages. The mace's operating special power is to suck the life force from the wielder's targets. Once the target is impacted by the mace it sucks their life force. It would do so by hitting the enemy with the mace, the dracula teeth would then suck the enemy's plasma and mana. It would only take the important bodily fluids blood, blood plasma and jizz. Once drained, the victim evacuates their bowels at the speed of sound causing a thunder-crack that can be heard for miles. The thunder-crack is not a fart because the mace also eats farts. Trivia * If Halloween could have a favorite weapon, it would be the Dracula Tooth "Mase" of Blood Letting. * The mace itself doesn't smell bad, but everything around it does. * The current whereabouts of the mace are unknown but it is believed to be in New Jersey but nobody wants to go there to look for it. * The mace is the reason why the Jersey shore is sucj a filthy place. * The mace sucked all the good out of the people in New Jersey and the beach as well * It might be in the Jersey Pine Barons. * The Jersey Devil might have it. Episode Appearances * Episode 2 - Weapon Tales! (Josh): "The Dracula "Mase" of Blood Letting"